A little less than two years ago, at the beginning of the pandemic, I wrote a blog called An Ode to Hope. I was hopeful back then because it seemed like people were rallying together and supporting one another during a very horrific moment in the history of the world. We were applauding healthcare workers on a regular basis, staying home and masking up to protect not only ourselves, but others around us. But now, reading that post after nearly two years of surviving through this pandemic, I couldn’t help but shed a tear. What an incredibly tough time this has been, probably for all of us, but I do believe that the level of suffering is disproportionate and I know that I am one of the lucky ones. My wish for the world about 18 months ago, was that we would all look at ourselves, at the way we live, at the way we don’t care enough for each other, and hopefully change the way we exist. But alas the world still seems to be ticking on like it was two years ago, still worshipping money and in our quest for survival, it seems that looking out for yourself is the way that society is going to keep on running. And I’m left thinking, where is the empathy?
So many people have lost their livelihoods or loved ones over the last two years and it seems to have hit those in lower socio economic demographics the worst. I look at New York now, compared to two years ago and the rich seem to be doing just fine, but the poor are faring worse than ever. During the pandemic the industry I work in, theatre, disappeared. It was one of the scariest moments of my life, and although things are opening back up, it’s still on shaky ground. Many colleagues have taken up other pursuits out of necessity and I’ve even tried to reinvent what I do in order to ensure my financial security. I spent a lot of time over the last couple of years with someone who had just sold their tech company for several millions of dollars. This person had received an initial million dollar payment and was nervously awaiting the second payment. This was their pandemic pain. Everyday I would listen to the ‘God I hope I get my other $2 million soon’, story, which I empathized with up to a point. And while I sat and hoped that I would still have a job and be able to pay my rent, it boggled my mind that this person had no conception of how it would make me feel to sit and listen to the ‘I want my $2 million’ story day in and out. A first world problem, as my Nigerian brother-in-law would say. And again I was left thinking, where is the empathy?
I have seen delivery drivers being yelled at for delivering the incorrect order by the privileged person who can work at home and not have to leave the safety of their apartment for food. I’ve spent a lot of time in Wyoming over the last month and hardly see anyone wearing masks and hear stories from my healthcare worker friends about getting death threats from people who don’t believe in Covid. How can you not believe that a disease exists? And why should the healthcare workers even treat your sick relative who has Covid if they don’t believe it exists and refuse to get the vaccine? I have a constant battle with my health insurance company to cover any healthcare costs, even though I pay a ridiculous amount of money to them every month. This is something that no one should have to worry about in a time like this. I was told that my premium had to go up because the company was taking a hit during the pandemic. Wouldn’t it be nice if the company said, ‘well we make enough profit each year, how about we give back to the world and put the care back into healthcare!’ I see students pushing themselves beyond realistic expectations of what is achievable in this current climate. Our mental health is suffering but we’re expected to keep running around the hamster wheel like everything is ‘normal’. It’s not normal!! These are not normal times. They still aren’t. What are we striving for anyway? Where is the empathy?
And I have to admit I am also guilty of burying my head in the sand with my own worries and concerns. I kick myself time and time again for not reaching out to others who could use a few kind words or a hug, or burdening them with my problems when they have troubles of their own. I hate to say it but I have had many a moment over the last few years where I have stopped and said to myself ‘Tina, where is your empathy.’ So in 2022, I want to set this right. I have received such wonderful support from friends and family over the last few years and my hope is that going forward i am just as supportive. My head is coming out of the sand and please pull me up if it doesn’t!!
I wanted to start off 2022 in a hopeful fashion but this is what is coming out of me today, so perhaps this is where we need to start. I’m not saying that there’s no empathy in the world, but I believe there is something lacking in the way in which society operates in general and I wish that the generosity I receive on a micro level would seep out to influence the behavior of the masses
At the end of 2021, I made a decision to get off of the hamster wheel and embrace emptiness for a while. One of my best friends from Australia now lives in Wyoming, and I made the trip out to the cold and the mountains to clear out the cobwebs. On Christmas Day 2021, in the middle of nowhere Wyoming, we climbed a mountain that was covered in 2 feet of snow. We stood at the summit and looked out over the beautiful white powdery vista and the only sounds I could hear were the whistling of the wind, the faint caw of a raven and my heartbeat. And as I looked out over this blissful scene, with wonderful silence filling my ears and my heart, I shed another tear. A tear for what the world has endured over the last two years, and how much resilience it has taken for us all to just survive. But rather than letting it purely be a tear of pity, I want it also to be a tear of hope, not just for myself, but for the entire human race. My hope is that we can listen, empathize and support each other in times of need, rather than take what we need from people and discard them when they are no longer of use. What the world needs right now is a big dose of empathy, otherwise we’re just going to implode. That’s my ode to hope in 2022. Can we look outside of ourselves and just be kind to one another? There’s much more for me to write on this topic, but I’m going to hike up another snow-covered mountain and get my nature fix before going back to the city. Happy New Year everyone! I hope it’s a good one.